Buga Buga Boo!

                                                   

Things That BUG ME  

• I'll get a text. Like a dutiful friend, I reply. Then.................nothing. I did not initiate this text yet the "initiator" who has started what seems to be a substantive conversation - drops out. Next morning they reply to my reply. ARGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!
• When someone has neglected to respond to an email, text or voice mail of some importance then say when confronted "Sorry, I've been busy" - like you have no life but they do - oh, your that person that is so busy - oh, gee, okay, well, I'll just crawl back in my hole until you are ready for me - okay?
• I absolutely despise public parenting. That is when a mother or father grandstand with teachable moments for all to hear and see so that we are awed at their remarkable and progressive technique OR even worse is the public scolding. I really hate this. The poor humiliated child will probably be scarred for life. Here in aisle 3 at Target, little Jacob or Jenny have their foundation laid for future therapy.
• Switching gears - I hate audience participation. I buy a ticket to hear a singer, comic etc. NOT to hear myself - unrehearsed I might add. I just hate it when they ask us to sing along or clap or dance or anything. Leave me alone and entertain me OR pay me for my participation.
• Award show acceptance speeches can be fun and even moving. They can also be a big bore. That is when the winner pulls out a piece of paper or a card and rattles off a list of names - agents, grips, best boys, caterers etc. They are suppose to be performers. Where's the flair - the wit?
• Switching gears, again - You know those cheese sticks that separate from a group of cheese sticks? I like the sharp cheddar. To open a stick you must pull down a cellophane tab and wallah - cheese! Well, there is always a pack of sticks that will not open this way because the tab has been so firmly sealed with no perforation so to open them after struggling for untold minutes, you must resort to finding scissors and cutting them open in which case some of the cheese remains on the scissor blade. Gross! I always promise myself I am going to write a letter of complaint. Surely, Kraft will reply with an apology and a year's supply of cheddar sticks. Someday I must write that letter.
• Switching gears - getting serious - I hate phony liberals. You know, like Alec Baldwin  - blowhard self important asshole Alec Baldwin who pretends to be on the right side of all the liberal issues but behaves like an over the hill skinhead. I am sick to death of him and people like him. Fuck off, Baldwin. Gay people don't need or want you as an advocate. Your a fading pretty boy with ego maniacal tendencies who has over stayed his welcome. As my no nonsense Dad used to say "Go chase rabbits!"
• TV news teasers drive me batty. Serious news is non existent except for PBS Nightly News. I especially abhor teasers like "Toxins founds in a popular breakfast cereal. Details at eleven" - meaning 11 PM.  In the meantime you low grade panic wondering if it was that bowl of captain Crunch you devoured that morning. Will you live until 11PM?
• Speaking of TV news - just when did scoring the news begin? Why does the war coverage or a street shooting have a soundtrack? Music to misery - real misery like typhoons and tsunamis is an insult to victims and an offense to viewers. There's plenty of entertainment shows to be had. Why turn the news into a vaudeville? Shame to all the networks and local news as well - just as guilty.  
• Reenactments on so called reality shows are also offensive. They sentimentalize and trivialize crime. Isn't fact always more powerful than fiction? Reality is drama enough. I don't need bad actors and hackneyed film tricks by 3rd rate directors to tell me a "true" story.
• So many people are decrying stores that will be open on Thanksgiving. It is greedy - yes - and we all tsk and shake our heads - yet, I will bet that Thanksgiving day after dinner - the stores will be packed - packed  - by many of those who condemned the idea.
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• In a similar vein, I am bugged to my very marrow by people who lack a social conscience. I am talking about friends and family who will dine at Chick-fil - A , Cracker Barrel and Dominoes Pizza or shop at Hobby Lobby or purchase Barilla products to name a few that have clearly and publicly denigrated gays and women. When you spend your money at such establishments, you are subsidizing my oppression. Shame on anyone who knows this yet continues to patronize these businesses.
• Switching gears - lesser evils such as seniors chewing gum in public, people who text openly while you are talking with them, tailgaters, overly solicitous wait staff, high pricing soft drinks and coffee in restaurants, self check outs in grocery stores that malfunction frequently enough to warrant an on site clerk to assist you.
• AND finally FOR NOW - I so hate modern audiences that over react by giving standing ovations at the end of every play whether it deserves it or not - WHY??, I also deplore the collective whooping and screeching in place of genuine laughter and applause.
• Sorry - one more - I HATE MELISMA or MELISMATIC SINGING - I do-ho-ho-ho-oo-oo-oo-whooh!