Part 2 - A GOOD LIFE

 

What I did, now that I look at it - what I did was just as I did when I moved to New York over 30 years ago. I began a new life here in Buffalo. I made new friends and pursued my interests sans my family and boyhood friends. Its as if I were in another town away from home except I was home. Home. No. Hometown. Yes. Home town. I left home twice didn’t I? My home town and my real home - my soul home -  New York City. The place that defined me. The city that gave me my life. What made me think I could leave it. Well, I did. And, really, coming back to my home town wasn’t a trip down memory lane. The place looks so different. Buffalo is a ghost. Well, maybe that’s not fair. A ghost is the result of death. Buffalo isn’t dead. And its not dying. Its - what is it? In a coma? The kind you come out of after a couple of weeks. No, this coma has been much longer than that. So its not a coma. What then? I don’t know. It feels haunted and a bit sad and also strangely on the brink of something - something. But whatever it is, I do not recognize it. I didn’t come home. I moved to another place that I don’t recognize - to a place that doesn’t recognize me either. So, as I said, its like starting over. But I don’t want to start over. If I moved back to New York, my life would definitely resume. Then my occasional visits here would be as they were before - pleasant and shallow - which is fine with me - it would hurt less. Oh, much less.

                                                         

That is an option - leave Buffalo. I still have an apartment with Glenn in New York City. We do keep it up for our quarterly visits. I could keep the house and reverse this notion. I need to do something. This estrangement just hurts too much. I’m angry and sad and filled with contempt. Sometimes - a lot of the time - most times I truly feel I could just chuck it all. Accept it all. This is how it is, now. You have a loving husband, nice friends and no family. I feel I can live with that. I can. And yet…

                                                        

How To Post A Comment

I have heard from several readers of this blog regarding the difficulty they have been having in attempting to leave a comment after any of my posts. Well, I apology for your difficulty. Fairly new at this blog thing, I just learned to check my settings. I have, now, made changes. Therefore, if you are moved to leave a comment it is a simple thing to do. You are not required to subscribe to google or this blog. Here's how to do it.

At the bottom end of each posting by me you will see my name and the time posted. Next to that you will see a number preceding the word comment OR you will see the words " no comment". Simply click on that - basically the word comment AND a blank box with the heading "Post A Comment"  will appear where you can write your reaction  of any length to my postings. When you are done writing, you will see "Posted as" and a drop down menu with options. You can choose "NAME/URL" - enter your name - no need to enter URL - and then click Publish AND you will have posted successfully.

 If you have accessed my blog from a link - for instance a link on facebook or from a search engine or just anywhere a link to my blog appears  - you will see the "Post A Comment" box without having to click on "comment". I hope that's clear because I'm getting dizzy............but seriously............

I hope you will give me feedback - interact - comment. I only ask that whatever is on your mind is stated civilly in your posting. You do not have to agree with me. That is as welcome as praise. Just be nice - well, I hate that word NICE - so weak - how about KIND - yes, be kind. Thanks for reading.

A GOOD LIFE - PART 1

                                                       

 

 

I’m older than I ever thought I’d be.  I still hope but I know that’s just a mind game. There’s nothing much else for me. Its over. I’ll never be what I wanted to be. Never. I just didn’t learn how to achieve it. I wasted a lot of energy doing all the wrong things. But, I was sincere which did not help me one iota. Who cares about sincerity?  Who cares about feelings - other peoples feelings or what others want. Everyone’s caught up in their own head. No one is looking out. No one cares. Why should they? Who am I that anyone should drop everything to rush to - help - give a break. I didn’t know how. I still don’t. I’ll die not knowing.  

I wanted so little yet, it was too much. And now I have to face it. I just won’t ever get what I wanted. - what I really wanted. I’m too old. I’m too complicated.  

                                                                                                    

I use to be so cute. Not gorgeous. Just cute. Everyone wanted me. I was that available. No one was a bigger sucker than me for a compliment or attention. Wanting me was my world. Each and every day I looked forward to the string of come-ons and approaches that always came my way. I could bet on it. Today, right now, is no different. I still hope for this attention every single day. Is it just habit? Of course it is. Who would want me as I am. Sometimes I forget how old and unappealing I am. Then I catch my reflection in the mirror at the gym or a store window. There I am - an old man.  

When I was young - and I was young for a very long time - my reflection although not perfect , did not distress me. I was cute and quirky and very sexy. Everybody wanted me and I wanted everybody who wanted me. It was too irresistible. This, obviously was my downfall. I know that now. 

 

But I wanted to sing. I still do. However, as I have said, I’m old. My voice is not the shimmering instrument it once was. 

 

However in some instances these are significantly happy days for me. I mean, I got married two short years ago. Same sex marriage is now legal in New York State. So after 33 years loving Glenn deeply - deeply - we married because we could damn it! Glenn is the happy part of my life. This has been my one constant. Plus I have some terrific new friends and a satisfying creative curriculum. My sadness, my one unhappiness stems from - aside from not realizing my life’s goal - my one unhappiness , when I think about it and I try not to think about it - my unhappiness comes from estrangement. I have four sisters and one recently deceased younger brother. My parents are deceased as well. 

 

 I only speak to one sister.  

 

My brother didn’t much care for me. Almost three months before he died, he began calling me - frequently - almost daily. He knew he was dying due to a devastating diagnosis of pancreatic cancer. My mother also was killed by this terrible disease.  Georgie, my brother,  took to calling me buddy as in "I love you, buddy." He actually asked me to sing at his memorial - even picked the song. I wasn’t familiar with this Christian gospel tune.  Georgie directed me to youtube  to learn it. I never did. There wasn’t enough time. However, I did sing for him. Glenn and I drove down to Indianapolis for his service. It was quite something. He had so many friends and they were so generous with their memorials and reminiscing.

 

Who were they talking about? I didn’t know this Georgie. Why didn’t he ever give me this Georgie. We could have been such good friends. But I have to thank him anyway for the trip down. Glenn and I had a great time in Indiana. We did - despite the reason we had traveled there. It was my first time visiting Georgie’s home. No invitations had ever been extended. I, on the other hand, invited my brother many times to my home in New York City and here in Buffalo. He would accept but never show. Never.  Most times he would drive up from Indiana to visit.  Mary Jane, his wife, would not accompany him. He’d stay in a highway motel. He would visit my sisters. Patsy first then Gloria and finally Jeanie. Mimi wasn’t around to visit since she lives in Georgia but I was usually around and he just wouldn’t call me, drop by, ask me to meet him at Patsy’s or Gloria’s or Jeanie’s house which was a mere 5 minutes from my home.

 

He’s gone, now - dead -  and I shall never know why - why he didn’t want to see me. Its not like we had a falling out. We didn’t. No fight - no disagreement. He just carried on with his life - erasing me from it. And I shall never ever know why.  

Now, I know why Patsy won’t speak to me. However, Glenn and I are at a loss. We have no idea why Mimi won’t speak to us - has simply cut us out of her life.  As for Gloria - well we just reconnected in a very slight way.  So that leaves  sister Jeanie whom I do speak to - hurrah! Someone in my family actually likes me.  

But then there is the matter of the nieces , nephews and cousins. Oh, it is just too much  - too daunting to review. I think its an Italian thing - all these recriminations and feuds and silences. Vendettas! Except, when Ma and Dad were alive - feuds or no feuds - we were a family - cousins , aunts and uncles all talking, fighting, laughing crying talking - talking.  

I recently discovered a box of photos the other night - midnight to be exact AND, well, all I can say is - its a good thing I was in the country. In my home in NYC, my neighbors would have wondered where that heavy sobbing was coming from so late at night! It really did move me to see all those wonderful photos from days gone, sadly, by. Gee, how handsome my Uncles were. How handsome was my father. How pretty my Aunts, my cousins, my mother. I forgot how young everyone was. As Aunt Annie bemoans so do I the lost "art" of familial connection. I dare say, I could pass some of my relatives on the street without recognizing who they are. Back in the day, we all saw each other so frequently due to our parents' obvious need to stay connected. I played with my cousins. I got advice and sometimes scolded by my loving aunts and uncles. Hugged by Grandma Scarsella.

 

Chestnut Ridge, backyard gatherings, house parties, get togethers - so much connection. Its no one's fault why this all stopped. Its the world - it changed - we changed. Values changed.  Glimpsing at the past - remembering - the sharing - staying in touch - connected - all history - a history with no legacy. My parents would weep.   

And I weep inside for all this loss.  I took it for granted for all those New York years. You think it will all be there when you are ready to go back - that it all  is on hold waiting for you - and you just press resume and WALLAH!  That’s the conceit of the young. Mom and pop and everybody else is hankering for you. Your living your life out of their sight. Well, they are doing the same. Never thought of that, did you?  No ones waiting for you and if they are well, the you they were waiting for has been drastically altered. They may be intrigued for awhile but when you thought they were on hold. They thought you were on hold.

 

The past has passed. Who are they anymore - who are you?

Its like starting over again. There’s no picking up where you left off. The game has changed and it’s a game you have never played.  So what do you do?  

 

 

Music Soothes The Savage Beast

My last post made a few people unhappy. That was not my intention. I wanted to share with you my deep feelings of anger and frustration. Yes, I am so sick and tired of today's clutter. We are all stepping on each other. We block progress. If we don't like something we get in its way. Never mind that this thing, idea, person we dislike has nothing at all to do with our lives.
 WE JUST DON'T LIKE IT!

Here's a sampling of OVER HEARDS:

" How dare they have babies without getting married."

" OMG, those guys are kissing right out here for everybody to see!!"

"  Look at the way she wears her hair."

" Where in hell did he get those shoes?"

"How can someone so big show their face at this buffet!"  

"Such a good looking guy - What does he see in her?"

And then there's the racists remarks - the anti Semitic, the homophobic that I just won't mention. We all know those remarks. You know, the ones that are usually prefaced with "Its not that I'm prejudiced....OR....I believe in live and let live but...."

All these matters big or small are none of our business unless it is our business. We must all get out of each other's way. I am going to try very hard to do this - to lighten up - to save my rage for the big stuff - for the times where it might do some good. So, while you are mulling over my little preach - if you are mulling it over, listen to my playlist below. I love these 8 songs by these particular artists. Its my gift to you -  especially for Christine and Vinny.

                                                    


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxJHQER9kWc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGXHyp08mcE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfzlveJYkUI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKqT6g0o9i4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LevtxdaR14E

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JrkIt0UOWCg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWEdR09mA4A

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDQiOnttN9Q

The End Of Tolerance

I have made a decision. I will no longer tolerate intolerance - not from family, not from friends and certainly not from strangers. I HAVE Had IT! Anyone who cannot support our president after his inaugural speech is not a good American. It doesn't matter what side of the political aisle you sit. His speech focused on human rights, quality of life issues, future hopes and promises to fulfill. These things cannot and should not be debated. These issues are not Democrat or Republican matters, they are human and humane matters. WE MUST ALLOW PROGRESS. MY LIFE IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE!

PROGRESS: Gay Rights - marriage, education

PROGRESS: Gun Control - STOP YOUR FUCKING LOVE AFFAIR WITH GUNS, AMERICA - Do you know there are people who hate Obama purely on this issue. Why, I ask you, are guns so important? Personally, I feel all guns should be banned BANNED! STOP YOUR BELLY ACHING, HUNTERS. STOP HUNTING. This isn't the wild frontier where you need to shoot your dinner. I have no sympathy for you. You'd rather have the right to have all kinds of guns including assault weapons than giving gay people the right to marry, the right to BE. I hate you for your selfishness, your ignorance, your inhumanity. FUCK YOU AND YOUR GUNS!

PROGRESS: Climate Change - issues regarding global warming are real. STOP THE DENIAL. Get educated - know what you are being warned about.

PROGRESS: Black President - get over it you racists - WE HAVE A BLACK PRESIDENT. WE HAVE A GREAT PRESIDENT. Barack Obama is very much the leader for NOW and the FUTURE. He gets it. He has vision.

                                                 

INTOLERANCE: Anyone who bashes MY president and disagrees with his humane polices is not my friend. It is that simple. How can you call yourself my friend if you do not support my rights as a gay man to have my marriage recognized LEGALLY  in all 50 states instead of just 9? For those Romney supporters in the last election, I tolerated your choice. That was stupid of me. By tolerating your choice, it meant I was okay with you wanting a president that would oppose any rights for me and all other gay people. Why would you want that for me. Or are you just so selfishly in love with your guns that eveything else just doesn't matter? Or is your racism so deep - even though you deny it. I can't tell you how often I've heard those who so strongly oppose Obama say to me, "...and I say that, not because he's black". Right - unhuh. Gotcha.

BARACK OBAMA IS THE FIRST PRESIDENT TO MENTION EQUALITY FOR GAYS IN SUCH A SUBSTANTIAL WAY AND IN AN INAUGURAL SPEECH. This is major for me and that is why I have been inspired to take this position of INTOLERANCE.

I know that I am preaching to the choir for many of my readers. For those who disagree and still consider me their friend, sorry, but I just don't get it. Why would you think I would still want to be your friend when you support those who would gladly send me back into the closet.

CIVIL RIGHTS IS NOT UP FOR DEBATE.

CIVIL RIGHTS IS JUST THAT - CIVIL RIGHTS!!

GET IT!

It Is My Country, Too!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAuK97eo1F8

What Is A Friend

                                                           


Every year since 1984 I would receive a letter inside a Christmas card from a woman I barely knew. Shirley, the mother of Shawn, a 15 year old actor who played Billy in Circa 21's production of "On Golden Pond" in Illinois took a liking to me. She saw that Shawn and I had bonded. He was such a delightful kid - talented and very smart. I saw a bit of me in him. He had the offerings of the whole world so abundantly in his reach. I guess I envied him a little but liked him a lot. Shirley obviously recognized this and, so, took me into her life as well. While in Illinois doing this crowd pleasing play, I spent a few days here and there as a guest at her home just hanging out and having dinner. Shawn would walk me half way home and we'd have long talks about music and the arts and such. I was amazed at his particular tastes. Here was a 15 year old boy talking about Charles Ives!

Anyway, the play ended after a long run. I stayed on to do "The Music Man" and Shawn and Shirley went back to their lives. Since they lived close by, I continued to see them when time would permit. Rehearsals were pretty grueling and then, of course, we settled in for a long successful run.

When I returned to my home in New York City, Shawn wrote a few letters but as will happen with the young, their lives go every which way as they discover and uncover the world -their world - so his letters stopped. Maybe, if we had had email back in the 1980's, keeping in touch would have been easier. Come December of my year back from Illinois, as Christmas approached and the cards began arriving, Shirley's first card and letter to me appeared in my mail box. It recounted Shawn's and her's  goings ons since I last saw them that year. The card and letter was signed Shirley and Shawn. In subsequent years the signing changed to just Shirley. And so this continued for 28 years. I began to know Shirley through these annual letters. What emerged was a warm and very loving person. A woman a little pummeled it seemed by life. A single mom with grown children who all lived in places other than Rock Island, Illinois. Even Shawn moved to Denver where he eventually married. He didn't stay in theater although he has a band that performs in Colorado performing music he composes - the Charles Ives influence? I learned through Shirley's letters that Shawn went to China with his wife. I learned that Shirley's job was not secure of late and worse, that her health was not the best. She never explained what her health issues were but I could easily surmise they were serious. In all this time, it was Shirley who evolved into my friend. I haven't heard but twice from Shawn in those 28 years - once about 5 years ago when he was planning a trip to NYC which never happened and 2 years ago when I received a post card from China.

This Christmas of 2012, I did not receive my annual card and letter from Shirley. I felt it odd but didn't think much else about it. After all, these "friendships" tend to drift off. 28 years was a pretty long run but, well, we haven't actually seen each other since the early 80's. And, of course, not a word from Shawn. Last night I thought about Shirley. I may not know her like her intimates but its not like Shirley to drop me like this. So I googled her.

Dear Shirley passed away December 1, 2012. Her obituary stated that her memorial service was held  in Rock Island on December 7, 2012. No mention of cause of death. Shirley was 77.

Maybe, I will finally hear from Shawn. But probably not.

Nicki Minaj

The only reason to watch American Idol this season is Nicki Minaj. She is funny, smart, pretty and just something else entirely. I haven't been an Idol watcher in years. I decided to check it out this year mostly out of curiosity due to the much publicized new judges - Nicki being one of them. This lady of whom I know very little has that most important quality that TV producers covet - likability. She over flows with it. Now, I must admit, after viewing her on youtube following the show, Miss Minaj isn't my cup of tea musically. However, she is a terrific performer and I very much enjoyed her music videos. I understand why she is a star. And now, Nicki Minaj can add me - a most unlikely person - to her fan base.
                                    

WEGMANS Afternoon Delight!

I went grocery shopping today. I also ate out today. It was at the same establishment. A place we frequent and yet never take for granted. Each time I go there I am put in a good mood whether or not I entered it that way. So, today after tasting pumpkin bisque and Parmesan flan, herb baked tofu, chicken curry, other assorted baked and flavored tofus, terriyaki meatballs and a French vanilla muffin - the vanilla was so intense - I just had to write this unsolicited testimonial for my favorite WNY store. 

Is there no better food shopping experience in Western New York than Wegmans. They have everything. Having lived in New York City for most of my adult life, I have gotten accustomed to having just about anything my pallet desires without having to embark on a time consuming search. I feared I would have to do that here in Buffalo or just go without my favorite foods. I soon discovered Wegmans after I bought my house in Hamburg. Believe me when I say, Wegmans has enough of what I like to keep me satisfied.And the quality is superb. The ambiance is unmatched. It is a beautiful store. I have never encountered such a friendly, knowledgeable and - not that this is terribly important - attractive staff. They all seem happy to be there and happy to interact with the customers.

And let me dispel a tired old MYTH about my beloved Wegmans. Wegmans is not more expensive than Tops! In fact I find it cheaper. I think what confuses people about Wegmans is that, unlike Tops, they carry high end products. So one might gather from this fact and the upscale appearance of this store that it must be expensive. It is not unless you must have fillet Mignon, and salmon steak every day of the week. The thing about Wegmans is that you can shop with a champagne pocket book or a beer wallet and you will still be satisfied. By the way, have you tried their food bar? OMG!! International defines this gourmet layout. With chefs and foodies mulling around, the Wegmans food bar is a savory delight.

DISCLAIMER : I do NOT work for Wegmans. I do not own stock in Wegmans. I JUST LOVE WEGMANS.

SAY WHAT?

"There won't be a big coming-out speech tonight, because I already did my coming out about a thousand years ago in the Stone Age, in those very quaint days, when a fragile young girl would open up to trusted friends and family and co-workers and then gradually, proudly to everyone who knew her to everyone she actually met," she said. "But now apparently, I'm told that every celebrity is expected to honor the details of their life with a press conference, a fragrance, and a prime time reality show. You guys might be surprised, but I am not Honey Boo Boo Child. I'm sorry. That's just not me, it never was, and it never will be, but please don't cry because my reality show would be so boring."
"If you had been a public figure from the time you were a toddler, if you'd had to fight for a life that felt real and honest and normal against all odds, than maybe to you might value privacy above all else.... I have given everything up there from the time that I was three-years old. That's reality show enough, don't you think?" - Jodie Foster on the Golden Globes

                                                   

It seems Jodie Foster came out tonight on the Golden Globe Awards telecast. I mean, I think she did BUT, well, she is such a private person. SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU CHOSE SUCH A PUBLIC PROFESSION, JODIE, IF YOU ARE SO GOD DAMNED PRIVATE! Or is it that you are so private only about "that".  You are not private when you have a film to promote. We, in fact, know a lot about you as we do with other major film stars. The only thing you hold back on is NOT your private life BUT you hold back on who you essentially are. What other stars do that but closeted gay stars?  Marriage, love, children is not a private affair. These are matters of record and even documents. No, Jodie, your cry for privacy is a pathetic attempt to covet your shame. Your veiled coming out tonight on the Golden Globes is as sad as the company you keep ( Mel Racist, Homophobic, Anti-Semitic, Sexist Gibson) - talk about a self loathing homo!  I say, Jodie, stay in the closet. You are the poorest example Hollywood can possibly offer young and not so young gay people who are still (in 2013) struggling to live freely. You, Jodie Foster, with your selfish pleas for privacy is a contributing factor for impeding their struggle.

From the many online comments regarding Miss Foster's acceptance speech for, ironically, humanitarianism, most viewers did not understand her speech.

So, Jodie, life goes on for you with little change except, of course, you have that dear little golden globe knick knack to display on your oh so private mantle of your oh so private world.

 SAME AS IT EVER WAS!

Music

I know the love of music is subjective. But that doesn't excuse bad taste in music. Leonard Bernstein was known to say, "There are only 2 kinds of music - good music and not so good music." This was very generous of the Maestro. I would have to amend that for myself and state that, yes, there may be only 2 kinds of music BUT, for me, it is good music and BAD music. I am one who really likes all genres of music. A quick perusal of my Cd's, records, cassettes and downloads would convince you of my sincerity.  But, come on, lets all agree, some music is just bad and defies all subjectivity.  Popular music, especially today, is so problematic. So much of what we hear is not really the music but the performer. The singer has become the song. Therefore we are stuck with the likes of Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Justin Beiber, Maroon 5. Kanye West - the list is endless. Turn the coin over and we have Train, Bruno Mars, Adele and the list also goes on - perhaps a shorter list. The few survive, that is, the GOOD few. And hopefully they will survive and grow and deepen. Who will stay with us all their preforming lives - all our listening lives? Who will remain relevant even after they are gone? -  musicians like Sinatra, Ella, Streisand, Nat King Cole, The Beatles, The Stones, Garland, Holiday etc. You get my point. Who is on their way to leaving a permanent stamp?

I bring this all up because this evening I wasted 2 hours of my life watching The Peoples Choice Awards. I WILL NEVER WATCH THIS "SHOW" AGAIN! It was jam packed with bad jokes, bad music and lame celebs. Who nominates these people and WHO VOTES? I've never been handed a ballot and I am a people or so my passport says. The winners were such losers. Channing Tatum nominated in 2 acting categories!!

I GIVE UP!

Let me leave you with a really good song from a time when pop music had room for great recordings that actually charted and no one was surprised at its status. A time when pop music was extraordinary when compared to today's popshit.




                       https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jmqRtBkAh0

The Omega Men

Today was the strangest day. I began my day as usual with a good full bodied cup of Newman's Dark Roast coffee. I settled down in the proverbial easy chair in the living room to drink the coffee while I did a morning surf on the TV. In reviewing the grid I noticed Antiques Road Show is premieirng tonight with new episodes FINALLY! So, I DVR'd that and The Big Loser as well. Never watched this show but felt a weird compulsion to DVR it as well. Coffee done. TV surfing done. I head to the kitchen to have vanilla honey Greek yogurt for breakfast. Glenn had the same. I then did the three S's and off to the gym we went. Did some resistance and cardio, chatted with a few gym rats and left. We stopped at the Library to return "Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers" BluRay DVD. Then to Federal Meats to buy coleslaw. Stopped at Dollar Tree to look for a cheap frame for the puzzle Glenn completed depicting the beautiful old house on Big Tree Road and South Park. I grew up seeing that house. Dollar Tree did not have an adequate frame for Glenn's labor. Home we went. And the end of the world began.............

Did you ever have a day where you felt like you were the only surviving person on the planet?

Not a sound in the neighborhood. Where was everybody? The whole day our phone was silent. I didn't receive one text. I didn't even see a car on our street drive by.No dogs barked. The air was still - no sounds of wind or birds or planes overhead. Time seemed to stop. Even our movements seemed to lack sound. Had the Apocalypse begun?

It just was so weird. I felt like we were in a vacuum - a bubble - a void. It wasn't unpleasant or even scary. It was strangely comforting. It was like a snow day. Yes, that is what it was like - a snow day. We did snow day things like watch a movie in the afternoon. We ate dinner before 4 O'clock - steaming hot and spicy black bean soup, fried baloney sandwiches with onions, sweet pickles, horse radish mustard on terrific rye bread - toasted with the coleslaw.  Still in our bubble, we cleaned dinner away and napped deliciously for 30 minutes. Shortly after, we snacked on Madagascar vanilla bean cake that Glenn had baked 2 days ago before the Apocalypse. It was as delicious as our nap.

It is now after midnight - technically a new day and the bubble is yet to burst.

The Worst of 2012

2012 like any year included lots of duds, annoyances and just plan BAD stuff. Here's what comes to my mind:

Worst Movies of 2012 - We Need To Talk About Kevin, Avengers, The Cabin In The Woods, To Rome With Love, The Dark Knight Rises

Worst TV - Except for Top Chef and At The Actor's Studio, BRAVO has the absolute worst television with shows like the Real Housewives and a load of reality shows about unpleasant, self absorbed rich people. Then there's the TV staple, the Sitcom. Once a funny, charming and even relevant diversion, the situation comedy has become a half hour of insult comedy and toilet humor. Even Modern Family and The New Normal are beginning to unravel so early in the game.

Biggest TV Gripe - The Side Bar - On reality shows - even the good ones like Top Chef, Survivor and Amazing Race - there is this annoying thing they do. You all know what I'm talking about. As the program unfolds, the people participating are seen commenting on their actions expressing their feelings etc. What bugs me to no end is the vapid comments that actually result in a redundancy. We can see what is happening. Why do we need the characters to comment in an "off scene" shot on what we just witnessed. I HATE THIS PRACTICE!

Bad "Music" I witnessed in 2012 - Taylor Swift, Justin Beiber, Rod Stewart, Meat Loaf, the singing in the Les Miz movie, the singing on The Voice

Worst Food -  Pino's in Orchard Park, Casa di- Pizza in Buffalo, Wasabi in Buffalo, Joe's Coffee Shop in NYC 3rd Ave & 16th St., Popeye's on W. 14th St. Taco Bell on W. 14 St.

 I will avoid listing any Hamburg eateries. I live in this town. I am so tempted. Let me just say that Hamburg has some terrific places to eat. Of course, it also has places to seriously avoid. And these few places would be surprised on how they are viewed. But I will not mention them here. Just to tease with this remark - some upscales are a fraud.

As for groceries: Feel Rite has the worst produce. Walmart's fresh produce is inconsistent but meats and all other groceries are great.

Theatre in Buffalo is a joke. I have sampled all major companies and find therm amateurish. My biggest complaint is the sameness of it all. MusicalFare, BUA, O'Connell & Company and a few others I will not mention for personal reasons cast the same actors IN EVERYTHING. I dropped my subscription to MusicalFare & BUA because I couldn't take another play with John Fredo, Lisa Ludwig, Marc Sacco and many others. Same Same Same in tone, in style in performance AND what's most unforgivable - this practice of casting the same handful of actors produces a lot of miscasting. I remember a year or so ago seeing "Man Of La Mancha" at MusicalFare. The production was awful - much of it due to the miscasting of John Fredo in the title role AND worst of all - Lisa Ludwig as Aldonza. Aldonza is supposed to be a very sexy SPANISH beauty. The role requires exceptional singing. Check out the Broadway cast album. Here was Nordic Lisa Ludwig in a blond wig playing YOUNG Spanish spit fire Aldonza The Whore. Miss Ludwig is not a singer! It was laughable. Although I did not laugh at the time. I was just so pissed. By the way, Lisa Ludwig is married to Randy Kramer Artistic Director for MusicalFare. Could this be why Miss Ludwig is in so many of the shows? Which brings up this issue. It seems these frequently cast actors all seem to be in some sort of clique. One gets the feeling that they have joined hands and pick projects for each other. In other words, they are playing out their fantasies of big time Show Biz. The truth is what they are really participating in is  community theater AND trying to pass It off as professional. What's troubling is that the local press has agreed to join in the fantasy and report and review this shit like it is serious professional theatre. It is pretty outrageous.  

 Then there was Cabaret also at MusicalFare with middle aged, paunchy John Fredo in the role of the decadent MC. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? The actress playing Sally Bowles had this pretty little soprano voice and acted like a Miss America contestant in the talent competition.

BUA's plays lack any real production value. They do far too may campy plays and they do them badly. Let me conclude this rant by stating that these city theater companies' ticket prices are unreasonably high. I would also add that they all paper their houses due to low attendance. Yet they continue to receive corporate support so they can go on with their game of LETS PLAY THEATER.

Retail To Avoid - Sears for poor customer service, Radio Shack in Hamburg for ineptitude 

Coffee - I like Great Harvest in Hamburg Village BUT they need to serve hot coffee. Their coffee is ALWAYS tepid. I still prefer GH over Comfort Zone. Although their food is good, their wait staff leaves much to be desired. They need to be reminded that they work at a place called the COMFORT Zone.

Random thumbs downs - The Roundabouts in Hamburg are pretty BUT they do not improve traffic flow. Drivers are still unsure of roundabout etiquette. The abrupt pedestrian crossings at the roundabouts are dangerous. Why not place them farther down from the turn offs.

Thumbs down also to relocating the Hamburg Rocks The New Year to the municipal parking lot. The first year it was GREAT with the streets closed to vehicular traffic and the shops and restaurants all open and music on the street -  people everywhere. WHY, HAMBURG, DID YOU CHANGE THIS?

 My final thumbs down is to VBAC in Hamburg for their failure to support or sponsor the arts. AND LET ME SAY HERE AND NOW, THE MUSIC FESTIVAL IS NOT THE ARTS. We know why VBAC supports The Music Festival. By the way, the reason for their support and sponsorship of this festival is why I say it is not in the category of the arts. The musicians who participate, however, are artists.

Trends - I love texting. Its efficient in so many ways. What annoys me is the constant addictive texting that is so prevalent. I mean, people you are with are texting as they interact with you. It is so rude. What is really bad is that the texter feels it is perfectly OK to behave this way. I see people at tables in restaurants not talking - they are texting, heads down, fingers going - no one who is present is talking to each other - they are all texting someone who is not with them. Why don't they just go be with the one they are texting. Why isn't that person with them at the table?

Why do we all abuse technology so terribly?

Let me conclude this rant filled post with a BIG THUMBS DOWN  to the 2012 political campaigns especially the presedential one. Whatever side of the aisle you are on, let us all agree the run for presidnt was PAINFUL, UGLY, SHAMEFUL AND SCARY.

Negatives to Positives - employment, spending, abolish DOMA, lose weight America, live and let live

 America, end your love affair with guns.

 TAKE GUY FIERRI OFF OF FOOD NETWORK!!!

                                                   

 

The Truth About Les Miserables

I guess its a bit much for me to claim to offer the truth about Les Miz. But I am so sick of the "awesome"s and "amazing"s that are being flung around. Here's the truth - well, my truth - better?

There is much to like about the movie of the international hit musical "Les Miserables". There is also much to dislike. Visually stunning and acted well for the most part, this holiday feature is anything but festive. It is relentless in its dirge. My God, its a musical! It has been directed like it was "Schindler's List". Every song is performed exactly the same no matter the character. Its as if all the roles were one and the motivation as well. These characters lack a sense of humor and so does the director. From Hugh Jackman to Russell Crowe and the lot we get nothing but pained expressions and clipped lyric delivery. It is clear the actors are all struggling for tears and tragedy. One never gets the pleasure of hearing this score sung for its beauty. Frankly, with the directors encouragement, the cast is over acting - desperately trying for an Oscar nomination.

The only musical performance that works for me is Anme Hathaway. She surprises with a brave rendition of that most coveted of ballads, 'I Dreamed A Dream". It is refreshing to have this powerhouse of a song performed against the inclination to belt it. Hathaway goes for the truth and delivers a heart breaking performance that will surely get her an Academy Award nomination.                                                                                                                                                 

Hugh Jackman is well cast but delivers a one note performance albeit a good one note. But just think how great he could have been. He is a good Val jean. He should have been a great Val jean.

Helena Bodham Carter and Sacha Baron Cohen are NOT funny in the comic relief roles. They are just creepy and 100% unpleasant.

I think we are in the age of self indulgence in the performing arts. Performers are so hell bent on making sure we the audience get their pain that they hang their guts out for what? - our pleasure? Since when are guts entertaining or pretty. Recently "Porgy and Bess" was on Broadway receiving the 'awesome"s and "amazing"s just like Les Miz is now. And you know what? It was also performed in this big over indulgent manner. This beautiful score - my favorite -  was performed by actors concerned with serving themselves rather than the brilliant material they were so fortunate to interpret. Everyone wants to WOW the audience and the audience is either gullible or left wanting. I AM LEFT WANTING!